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The Downside of Novel Writing (Or what happens when self-doubt kicks in)

I have been writing daily all through November.  I did Nanowrimo and finished the novel I had started. I have been a member of Nanowrimo since 2010 and never done that. It turns out, there is a first time for everything. (If you are wondering, what the heck is this Nanowrimo you speak of - here's a link to their webpage . ) I carried on working on it, editing it, editing it again, printing a hard copy and editing it some more, until none of it made sense and it was just loads of words jiggling about in front of me. I have now sent it to my Beta readers and feel bereft.  And, as soon as the email wafted away down the internet tubes into the ether, I wanted to change it. I have also got to the point where I am filled with self doubt. I think the whole thing is pants. Why do I bother? Especially when the chances of me actually getting a real life publisher to read it is so slim that I may as well be ice skating on top of a tiny fish tank.  The one thing I am fairly confident of, is th

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